Rant
by You'veBeenJayed
Summary: Kyle drags Kenny to a garbage dump out of nowhere to rant about love. Not a K2, one-sided Style.


**This is based on some messaging rant I had when talking to my friend. Most of this is what I said, plus some added stuff for me and her to make it a story. In this, Kyle is me and Kenny is my friend, but it's going to be better than some short AIM conversation, so don't worry!**

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"And that's why I'm so pathetic," Kyle stated, staring blankly out into the snow-covered field from his position on the top of a mountain of garbage. He could see the town not too far in the distance. Snow was falling lightly from the sky, but it was ignored as a usual occurrence.

Kenny glanced up at him from his seat in a broken-down car with the roof entirely torn off. "How is that pathetic?" He had his feet propped up on the cracked dashboard, avoiding a spring popping up through the driver side's seat.

"It's pathetic because I fall in love too easily."

Apparently, Kyle and Kenny thought it would be a good idea to have a nice little talk in the middle of a garbage dump on the outskirts of town. Well, actually, Kyle grabbed Kenny after school and dragged him down there without saying much of anything until they got there. Kyle had seemed alright all day at school, so why he decided to act all quiet and depressed now was a surprise to Kenny. Especially since he never really acted this way at all.

Kenny let Kyle's words sink in some. He thought about how he was, whoring off with a new person all the time, not caring if it was a guy or a girl, and then how Kyle was, rarely with a girl at all; and if he was, it was never for long. In their two years of High School, both being sophomores, Kyle had only had two girlfriends.

"Don't say that," he told him. "If you say that, then that means I'm _damn _pathetic,"

Kyle turned around on his pile of junk in order to see Kenny better. "But you're not!"

"I am," Kenny responded matter-of-factly. How did this go from being about Kyle to being about him? He much rather know what was going on in that redhead's mind than talk about his own relationship crap.

Speaking of which, why was Kyle talking to him instead of Stan anyway? It was probably because Stan was off with Wendy. He wouldn't get anything about this 'love' talk anyway. Ever since he and Wendy got back together and she showed him 'the finger' (and not the middle one either), he always kept a one-track mind that constantly ran on thoughts about Wendy-this and Wendy-that. It was no wonder Kyle was discussing his thoughts with Kenny instead of Stan. Even if it was true that the two kept a constant on-and-off relationship as per usual.

Kenny heard Kyle sigh from above. "I just don't know where the line begins from when you still have a chance with 'him' or it's too late because you're friends now. I don't even see why it matters! I understand the 'line' but, c'mon, nobody wants to take any chances nowadays."

The blonde raised an eyebrow. Now that was certainly intriguing. "Uh, 'he', Kyle?"

Kyle nodded slowly, a look of misery on his face that made Kenny climb up there and pull him into a hug until he looked away. "Yeah, you heard right. I'm gay, okay?" He lowered his voice to a soft mumbled that Kenny had to lean forward in the car to hear. "Just...please don't tell anyone,"

Kenny made a locking motion with his hands next to his lips, tucking the imaginary key into his pocket. "Your secret's safe with me." Kyle gave him a thankful smile. "So who is 'he'? Just so I can get more of an idea of what this is exactly about,"

"...Stan."

"Gotcha. Go on. I know what you're sayin'," Kenny said understandingly.

It didn't take long for Kyle to get fired up again. "They always say that 'Oh, dating friends is bad because there's too much drama.' Why does there have to be drama? If you like each other, then go out. If you stop liking each other, then stop and stay friends. I don't get it," A few moments pause before he decided to become brave enough and go on.

"If, per se, Stan and I ever went out, I'd act natural, like we normally do. Maybe a little mush here and there, but that's it really. If he ever wanted to break up with me and stay friends, I wouldn't get all bitchy about it, cry, and be like 'You're an asshole' or anything. I'd just be like 'Oh, okay' and be fine with it.

"Everything would go back to normality."

Kenny couldn't help but laugh at Kyle's overenthusiastic ranting. He just sat back in his seat and nodded. "I know," he agreed, not wanting to say much to throw off Kyle's line of thought.

It hadn't done a thing to do so, however, because Kyle just kept right at it. "Yeah, it's dumb! But no, he doesn't even want to give it a try. I trust he wouldn't get all drama-y and crap, so why can't he trust me on that. Or any other guy to their female friends, vice-versa." The last two sentences Kyle spoke were statements, rhetorical, not even a question.

The blonde frowned, arms crossed calmly over his chest. "It _is _dumb."

Man, who knew Kyle could be so insightful? Kenny saw all this as the truth because, once you really thought about it, it basically was. And that was the cold, cruel reality of it.

Kyle scratched at his head, faintly wondering if he was getting fleas or some other disease from sitting atop this literal pile of trash. Why had he chosen a freaking garbage dump anyway? He shrugged it off, glaring at nothing in particular.

"Ugh, people these days, man. And it's not even their faults really... It's the people out there who _would_ actually get all bitchy and end the friendship for _no_ reason over it that gets everyone else scared to even try."

_Because of Wendy, Stan won't even give me a try,_ Kyle thought sadly in his head. It wasn't as if he hadn't attempted to get Stan's attention. He even asked him out! That took more guts than he ever knew he had.

And what did Stan do? Never even gave him an answer. The next week at school, he sat next to Kyle at their usual lunch table with all their friends, never mentioning a word about it or even acting any differently. Kyle didn't even know what to think about that; how to even react.

"I know." Kenny kept repeating the same line, but it was all he could think of to really say.

"Yeah, people suck sometimes," Kyle laughed to himself for reasons even he wasn't too sure about. "Because you know what? I do think Stan likes me. But he won't go out with me, because he's scared and doesn't want to accept my offer to go out with me because he 'Doesn't go out with friends to avoid drama.' There wouldn't BE any drama, but he doesn't realize that so he's scared," Another empty laugh, "which really sucks."

Kenny felt his heart go out to his friend. He knew exactly how he felt somehow. He lifted his feet up off the dashboard and leaned forward. "True, or he just chooses not to date anyone—well, other than Wendy—like Cartman." This is where he got a little off-topic. "But Cartman keeps saying his girlfriend is seven years old. I'm like," he made an annoyed face and acted as if he was hitting the invisible Cartman's head.

Kyle giggled at this and rolled his eyes, seemingly calmed down from his previous rant. "He says everyone's his girlfriend,"

"That too," Kenny smiled. "You know, I sometimes think that whatever Cartman blurts out, he means it,"

"Like tourettes?" Kyle thought back to that time way back in elementary school, then shook it from his thoughts. "Nah, I'm pretty sure he's just joking. _Some _things might be true. But I dunno. It's too hard to decipher which is which with him."

Kyle stood up and stretched. He half-climbed, half-slid down the enormous pile of garbage down to reach Kenny, who was jumping over the jammed car door to meet with him. They stood side-by-side as they began exiting the garbage dump.

The redhead took one sniff and made a face. "Dude, I need a shower,"

Kenny nodded, face equally contorted. "Yeah, same here. Why the hell did we go to a garbage dump?"

Kyle just shrugged, thinking how good of an analogy that was, how ironic it was that they did end up discussing all that in a garbage dump. He laughed a little and when Kenny raised an eyebrow at him, he spoke up. "Hey, Kenny,"

"Yeah?" Kenny asked.

"Love stinks."

"Yes, yes it does."

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**Wooh! So how'd you like it? In all honesty, I didn't even think of that totally awesome (c'mon, admit it, xD) analogy until the end there. I just had them talking in a garbage dump because it was random.**

**Read and review!**


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